*walks into starbucks* lemme get uh spaghetti bolognese macchiato
"sir we don’t serve that"
don’t bullshit me i saw the secret menu on instagram
angry and quite offended that you don’t have a crush on me
cleaned my room/did washing/had an incredz green smoothie for lunch/did all the readings for my sustainability unit which always has really interesting readings/getting shit done today/I feel better
cop: I’m arresting you for impersonating a police officer
me: I’m arresting you for impersonating a police officer